I don't know where I'm going to be in four years. So what? As long as I am seeking after God and trying to bring glory to His name, what's the problem? Where is my flawed logic? I feel like everyone else around me needs answers and I have begun to let it influence my thinking. I hate that I worry about this. I know that I just need to be faithful to do what He has called me to, and to serve where He has placed me now... so why am I getting so wrapped up in the future? I know He has been more than faithful in supplying me with the things that I need. And the funny thing is, I think one of the things that makes faith so beautiful is that it's blind. Why do I keep thinking that I need things spelled out for me or the answers written in the sky?
Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.
In the past I have always considered it a good thing to have "faith like a child". But sometimes I worry that that's not good enough for the people around me. Why isn't it? I still invest in scripture and knowledge. I know that can be dangerous or scary for some people to trust blindly, but I don't how else to live my life. When people ask how I expect to support myself, my future family, etc., I can't give them a straight answer. And I've been mocked for not knowing. For being naive and overly optimistic. I just don't understand why so many people need to know all the answers? I believe God will be faithful to me. He will provide all that I need. And that is more than enough for me.